Ten Hours of Sleep
For some reason, I've been exhausted the last few days. More exhausted than my usual level of exhaustion, anyway. So last night I decided to go to bed at 10:00 p.m.--at least three hours earlier than usual. For the first time in years, I'm going to get ten hours of sleep, I thought to myself.Smugly.
What follows is a transcript of what happened during that ten hours. Each entry (except the first) represents me waking up.
One note: our cat is named "Sprout," in reference to her diminutive size as a kitten, although a more appropriate name for her now would be "Field." I have translated Sprout's repetitive cries into my best approximation of what she was trying to say.
10:00 p.m.
I go to bed. I'm asleep within minutes.
10:35 p.m.
Thunder. Thunder. THUNDER.
11:17 p.m.
Sprout: I'M COMING UPSTAIRS. I'M COMING UPSTAIRS. I'M COMING UPSTAIRS. I'M WALKING DOWN THE HALL. I'M IN THE BEDROOM. I'M COMING ONTO THE BED.
11:31 p.m.
Thunder. Thunder.
12:15 a.m.
Sprout: I'M GETTING OFF THE BED. I'M WALKING DOWN THE HALL. I'M GOING DOWNSTAIRS. I'M GOING DOWNSTAIRS. I'M GOING DOWNSTAIRS.
1:20 a.m.
Sound of sawing wood, coming from an undisclosed source.
2:25 a.m.
Undisclosed person goes to bathroom. Undisclosed person flushes undisclosed toilet.
3:30 a.m.
Eli 3.9: Mommy. Mommy, wake up! I fell out of bed. Daddy, did you hear what I told Mommy? I fell out of the bed.
4:40 a.m.
Sprout: I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM. I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM. I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM. I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM. I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM.
4:45 a.m. Sound of bear scratching in gravel pit.
4:47 a.m.
Sprout: I WENT TO THE BATHROOM. I WENT TO THE BATHROOM. I'M WALKING DOWN THE HALL. I'M IN THE BEDROOM. I'M COMING ONTO THE BED.
5:30 a.m.
Sound of cassette player being turned on.
(from cassette player)
Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You?
We got some work to do now.
Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You?
We need some help from you now.
Eli 3.9: Let's move out, people! It's go time! My Daddy, I played the Scooby-Doo song when I came down here. I am cracking me up! Let's get up now!
Ten hours of sleep. Fresh as a daisy.
<< Home